Bedlam: The Final Chapter

Happy Saturday, Sooner fans. The Sooners did not follow my gameplan last week and now find themselves in a familiar position, having to win out and get some help in order to back door their way into the playoff conversation.

The Sooners took a massive hit in Kansas as Danny Stutsman, the heart and soul of this defense, injured his ankle/knee and his status is questionable coming into this one. Offensively, the Sooners are already down Andrel Anthony and now just this week Jalil Farooq got himself arrested during a traffic stop. 

Meanwhile, the Cowboys are on a four game win-streak and have the nations leading rusher in Ollie Gordon II. If you thought Kansas was motivated to beat the Sooners, wait until you see the atmosphere in Stillwater. 

The best example of my hopelessly dumb homerism is my belief that someday the Sooners will understand that when opponents play Oklahoma it's the biggest game of their life, and that the Sooners will meet and exceed that effort level because they know if they lose the opposition is going to cry for joy, rip down goalposts and have stories they'll tell their grandchildren. Every time. 

I am telling you, today, it's the same situation in Stillwater and I have my doubts the Sooners will meet the moment.

OFFENSE

Last week Jeff Lebby's gameplan was conservative to say the least. They ran the ball 16 straight times at one point. Everything they did was telegraphed. The Gavin Freeman jet sweep needs to be ripped out or redacted from the play sheet. Not once did the Jayhawks defense look like they were on their heels. This is unacceptable. 

First, hopefully, Tawee Walker returns after getting banged up last week. He showed he's RB1. Second, I will lose my goddamn mind if Nic Anderson doesn't get six targets. Third, the Sooners have to try and go vertical. 

It's staggering to me to watch this offense not find ways to scheme their playmakers to an open part of the field to let them make plays. 

Finally, clock management has to be addressed. If the Sooners find themselves in a two-minute situation in the first half again, with all their timeouts, and they run out the clock, well, it's time for a change of some sort. What the fuck is that shit? Pull your nuts out of your throat and get aggressive. The Sooners cannot score enough points to feel secure in a game. 

I am hoping to will into existence some schemes for playmakers to make plays and, as such, am picking Nic Anderson as my OPOG. That guy is going to play on Sundays and Lebby and Dillon Gabriel need to get him the fucking ball early and often.

DEFENSE

This defense has shown that they are good most of the time, great some of the time and almost always their own worst nightmare. Their ability to keep themselves on the field via penalty is staggering. They can't have that shit today. 

More than the potential loss of Stutsman, the Sooners need to have Gentry Williams at corner. Things go downhill fast when he gets hurt (and he gets hurt almost every game). 

Beyond dumb penalties, the Sooners need to either rush the quarterback or play pass defense. No pass rush and no pass defense equals disaster. The Sooners have been proving that too often of late. 

Oh and they also need to tackle this Ollie Gordon II fella because he will run rough shod on the Sooners and do it six ways from Sunday if it appears we didn't wear our tackling pants today.

I'll pick Dasan McCollough today for my DPOG. He looks like he's getting real comfortable and ready to make a leap.

THE SCORE

Did I mention how nervous I am about this one? The odds of the Sooners having their act together in all phases of the game are non-zero but not much better than that. Trouble lurks everywhere so the Sooners really need their shit together in the following areas:

• No cute bullshit in the running game. Give it to Tawee Walker and let him run north-south.
• Find ways to get Nic Anderson the ball in space and give Jaden Gibson some chances one-on-one to make a play.
• Limit, reduce or, gasp, eliminate dumb fuck penalties on defense.
• Blitz
• Make field goals
• Learn clock management (coaches)

If the Sooners find a way to do these things I believe they can win by two scores. I doubt they do though and they get hit in the mouth, find themselves down early with Little Brother losing their goddamn minds. If that happens hopefully the Sooners can buck up and find themselves having a chance to win by a field goal.

I'll take the Sooners here 37-34 in a fitting thriller to end this Big Brother-Little Brother rivalry.

Boomer to the motherfucking Sooner. 

Bedlam

It's Bedlam, bitches, and it's always more fun when it means something. Usually that something is Little Brother trying to wreck Sooner hopes and dreams. It is true that a Sooner loss would essentially end the season. However, Cowboy tears will be shed if their inexplicable bubble gets burst. It's win or go home today.

I'm not feeling all that confident about the Sooners chances. The Cowboys defense is legit and even if it were only passable that would give them an edge over what the Sooners have been trotting out more often than not. And, as mentioned, the Cowboys are playing for a title game berth and a shot at the playoff. It's in Stillwater at night. 

But let us not forgot who has been here before. In a dogfight you have to like the Sooners chances. God knows they can win close and ugly. You know the Cowboys could come out with either their nuts in their throats or overconfident. The Sooners are made for this. 

OFFENSE

I would love (though not enough to actually follow through looking for it) to watch the tape of some of these plays where Caleb Williams is going deep or hanging on to the ball forever just to see if there are any open underneath routes. I have to believe he's not going through progressions or something. There has to be something easier than what it seems like he is always trying to do. 

He needs to get settled down early. He needs to run early. I wouldn't be surprised to see some razzle dazzle to see if the Cowboys over run. 

CW needs to be the OPOG here but I'm picking Mario Williams. He's on the cusp of some big stuff.

DEFENSE

For all the shit talk on these guys they did play a nice game last week. It certainly seems like the infusion of Jalen Redmond is a big reason. Obviously, for the Sooners to have any chance they have to play their best ball today. 

This Cowboy offense is not exactly dynamic. They are certainly capable of mediocrity. If Redmond, Isaiah Thomas and Perrion Winfrey can get some pressure then the Sooners will get some breaks you can count on it. 

Conversely, this defense can also make the worst offenses seem dynamic. If they can't get off the field on third and medium plus I will be calling it an early night and sitting in the dark feeling sorry for myself like a little bitch.

My crimson colored glasses don't allow me to see this happening, though, and so I'm going to pick Jalen Redmond for my DPOG.

THE SCORE

The Sooners will show up on D. CW will use his brain and his feet. The Cowboy faithful will water their miserable little patch of prairie with warm coed tears.

The first team to 24 will win. Tonight it's the good guys. The Sooners win and make a pretty big statement, 31-17.

Boomer to the motherfuckin Sooner

Bedlam

2020 has decided to throw a bone to Sooner (and, begrudgingly, Cowboy) Nation with today's Bedlam matchup being meaningful, at night and on national television. Little Brother thinks this is their year so the prospect of the Sooners breaking their spirits while also getting back into Big 12 championship game contention is a cherry on the cake.

OFFENSE

The Cowboys believe they have a respectable defense for once and are eager put it on display. I do not wish them the best and am having difficulty imagining a scenario where they hold the Sooners under 35. The Sooners, and particularly Spencer Rattler, will need to make some poor decisions in the passing game to not make the magic number. 

Rattler's decision making continues to improve, however, and I think their plan today is to wear out the Cowboy defense with a bludgeoning mix of Rhamondre Stevenson and quick throws to the sidelines. It will pay off in the last 20 minutes with the Sooners going over the top and stocking the highlight reel. It's gonna be a party.

I'll go with Spencer today for my OPOG in what I can see being his best game as a Sooner. He's much more prepared for the spotlight here in late November than he was as the much ballyhooed wunderkind of early September.  

DEFENSE

There is no doubt the Sooner D is rounding into something resembling form but they need to be careful today. It's a knifes edge between playing fast and having that speed exploited and the Cowboys do have pieces around the field to turn strength to weakness. 

The key will be how Alex Grinch handles the second level. For instance, I would much rather see Brian Asamoah, DaShaun White, Nik Bonitto and David Ogwoegbu at the point of attack than having Bookie or, God forbid, Pat Fields trying to contain or shadow Spencer Sanders. 

You obviously have to stop Chuba Hubbard while also keeping Spencer Sanders from running the ball. Here is where the D-Line has to be aggressive like they've been all year without being too fast and running themselves upfield so quickly they get exploited. 

I may be prematurely prognosticating here but I'm going to pick a DPOG. Ronnie Perkins. He looks like a baby eater and will put on a show tonight.

THE SCORE

A lot of people think this will be low scoring by Sooner standards but I think the Sooners will get to that magic number of 35. The Cowboys will have to work hard for what they get and will get lucky a little too because it's Bedlam and shit gets wild. 

But I like the Sooners easy at home 35 Cowboys 20.

Boomer to the motherfuckin Sooner

Bedlam

Both Nate and Mark Schlegel have told me separately that, "This team just isn't that good". They are right. They manage to survive in a world of survive and advance but they do so by playing to the level of the competition and consistently being their own worst nightmare. Today it's Bedlam in Stoolwater, a place where season's go to get spoiled.

Will it happen today?

OFFENSE

Well, I've come to the conclusion that Jalen Hurts is the football version of Russell Westbrook. He's a ball hog. He manages to be both hero and goat mostly because he dominates the ball. You live (and win) with him but god damn can he frustrate.

I'm frankly over him. He's dragging the offense with an inability to share the ball. There are weapons three deep at every position. And yet they run this RPO which is more of a RRO which is more of a Jalen-O. I'm also tired of his "post-game workout I piss excellence" shtick. Quit fumbling the fucking football.

Today he needs to (in this order) hang on to the ball when he runs, make a read or two, get rid of the ball quickly and spread the love. He needs to have zero turnovers but he damn sure better not have more than one and that better be an interception.

In spite of my gripes I am picking Hurts to be my OPOG. It's begrudging but he really needs to have his shit together today.

DEFENSE

This group seems to be playing pretty well again. They've been handed some shit sandwich situations and mostly acquitted themselves well. My nightmare is that Chuba Hubbard runs for 275 yards on 25 carries or some shit and The Mullet calls the kind of pass game to give whoever their shit brick QB is the easiest time possible.

The Sooners have to get off the field and they need to be seriously aggressive on third down. If they can bottle up Hubbard on first and second down and get the Cowboys in third and long maybe they can get their QB to shit down his trouser legs a few times.

This group also has a penchant for making a big play when they have to. They will need to again today because, again, my faith in Jalen Hurts not doing something inexcusably bone-headed is shaken to the core.

For my DPOG I'm going Kenneth Michael Murray. He needs to play smart in his gap assignments and not overrun everything. If he can do that and he can get about 10-15 tackles I think that's a great sign for the Sooners.

THE SCORE

It's going to be close and it could be ugly. It might be like a couple of prize fighters just throwing haymakers at each other. I do not believe, like the Oklahoman, that this will be low scoring. I expect a lot of big plays for both teams.

I do like the Sooners though surprise surprise.

Sooners 38, Cowboys 35

Boomer to the motherfuckin Sooner

Bedlam

Another week, another big showdown for the Sooners. This one is the always heated in-state rivalry. OU didn't do so well in their last rivalry game, let's hope this isn't a repeat. The suddenly vaunted defense reverted to a very stoopsian feel against the high flying Red Raider offense. Sadly, I don't think it's going to improve much for the rest of this season anyway. Looks like OU will continue to have to outscore everyone in a track meet if they want to win games against the tough teams.

OSU is not as good offensively as they normally are, but this OU D is the cure for what ails any offense. I expect another shootout today, and OSU while inconsistent, has shown they can hang with and even beat some good teams. I'm thankful it's at home as a road test would have me clinched up like a snare drum.

Offense

It's becoming increasingly difficult to not look like a psychic when picking an OPG. Nearly every skill player goes off each week. Kyler Murray has been great, and after years of watching QB's in  his mold frustrate and tear apart the OU defense, it's a beautiful thing to have that on the right side. But, in a predictable attempt at outsmarting myself I'm once again going away from him. I like Trey Sermon in this one. Dude is a beast and he only seems to be getting better.

Defense

After two weeks of glad tidings against putrid offenses, the status quo was restored last week. Two uncharacteristic Murray int's early and an extremely questionable PI call on Parnell Motley late, didn't do them any favors, but they once again showed little ability to get consistent stops. I appreciate wanting to make offenses sustain drives, but the 18 yard cushion the DB's have been giving makes the 10 yard out all but guaranteed. I don't really have much faith in anyone, but Kenneth Murray has been pretty consistent, hopefully he'll do some nice things today. How's that for a tepid pick?

Score

The Sooners enter the day as 21.5 point favorites. I feel like I could make a decent living betting on Sooner opponents to cover. I certainly hope I'm wrong, but I just don't see how the D does enough to maintain that margin. I do think OU can score however and I like them to win this one 52-38, hitting the over in the process.


Boomer to the Motherfuckin' Sooner

Bedlam

Whoa mama, this is gonna be a tough one. The Sooners travel up the road tomorrow to take on the Oklahoma State Cowboys. The days of this being a big brother/little brother matchup are gone.  Granted OU holds a likely insurmountable edge in the all-time series, OSU has been consistently good for well over a decade now. The two teams are again highly ranked and again, both have plenty to play for.

The initial playoff rankings were released on Tuesday and they did an excellent job of serving as sports talk fodder and causing much angst and hand wringing. In reality, they mean absolutely nothing. The chances of these rankings being the same at the end of the season (when they do mean something) are as good as my chances of getting a nice bronzy tan next summer. Every team has it's fans (and sometimes coaches) complaining about where they are ranked and what they "deserve" etc about this time of year, I've been guilty of it plenty of times (this year included), but those complaints often have a way of working themselves out in the form of prompt losses. I didn't care for OU coaches and players coming out with that shit this week, if you win, it all sorts itself out. Which brings us to Bedlam, this and every game from here on out are must-wins if OU wants a shot at the playoff.

This week won't be easy. OSU comes in with a very high-powered offense that can score in bunches. If you've watched any OU football this year, that doesn't set up to be a great matchup against the Red Carpet. In my eyes, this game will come down to one position battle, the Sooner defensive line vs the OSU offensive line. If OU can generate consistent pressure without bringing the house, they have a great chance. If not, and the OU secondary is tested, it could be a long, frustrating day. OU will score, but that was never the question, how many times they can stop the pokes is.


Offense

How about the RB situation for the Sooners? I, and many others (I think), assumed this would be a weak point after the departures of Mixon and Perine. If anything it's looking like a major strength. To be fair, they are in a great position to succeed behind an outstanding offensive line and a QB that is a Heisman hopeful. But, nonetheless, they have really done the almost impossible job of being a committee where I'm happy to see any of them come in rather than the opposite. But back to that QB they play behind, he's been next to unstoppable lately. I think big rivalry games like this are what he lives for, I'm going with Baker Mayfield in this one. I think he has monster day and frustrates the Cowboy defense all afternoon.

Defense

In the "Credit Where Due" file, I'd like to submit Mike Stoops photo. I have complained a lot about his inability to make in-game, née in-season, adjustments. After a disastrous opening quarter of defensive football against Tech, the Sooners switched up their fronts and essentially dominated on defense the rest of the way. I have no idea (and even less faith) whether they can repeat that sort of adjustment, but it will be critical to the outcome of this game. As I alluded to earlier, getting pressure on Mason Rudolph and disrupting the run game up front is key. I will be as hopeful as possible and say DJ Ward has a big game on the edge and gets a sack in a key moment.

Score

My gut does not send out good vibes in this one. On the plus side, there is no way they can be looking past OSU. I choose to ignore the minus side. OU will need to play a very complete game, something they haven't done since Ohio State. Let's hope they get it together and crush the flying mullets. Sooners eke out a must-win 29-27.

Boomer to the Motherfuckin' Sooner

Bedlam

You couldn't ask for more in Stillwater today. The Sooners control their own destiny and, with a win, are in The Playoffs?! Should the Cowboys win they'll be pleading their case for the next two days for the playoffs. Even children understand this rivalry. My son and another kid playfully heckled each other at last night's Thunder game. For one day friends are enemies. Good times.

The best part about this game, besides what's at stake, is that each team has its full complement of players. Until Monday it seemed possible that the Sooners would be without Baker Mayfield, Semaje Perine and Joe Mixon. That's the equivalent of American Pharoah running without a leg or three. Mason Rudolph is evidently playing today for the Cowboys amidst rumors of a broken bone in his foot. By all accounts he's their "passer". 

Oklahoma is likely announcing a state of emergency but the weather, while miserable, doesn't look like it will be as bad as, say, TCU-Baylor from last night. 

OFFENSE

As mentioned, the big 3 are cleared to play. Had Baker not been cleared to play I would have rather seen Joe Mixon run Wildcat all night than Trevor Knight take the reigns. Holy smokes did he look awful last week. Being full strength portends nightmares for the Cowboys. They got exposed against Baylor. 

The Sooners will offer a steady does of the ground and pound while Mixon in (get it?) some play action deep routes to keep the Pokes honest. The Cowboys are going to see how well we can pick up a blitz. 

Today I'm leaning heavy on the guy who's gotten us here. Without Baker Mayfield who knows what our record would be. We certainly aren't in the playoff picture. We probably aren't getting mentioned outside of Oklahoma. He's got moxie, he understands what's at stake and there is no way this team lets up for one second today while he's able to play. 

DEFENSE

OSU has a quality offense. By now we've seen as much as we can to prepare for it. Unfortunately it's been everyone's B-team. However, the Sooners D has totally redeemed itself over the course of the season and this group is salty. There is nothing OSU has seen to prepare. Big advantage for the Sooners. 

The Cowboys are going to keep on trucking with their deep ball until we can stop it. We'll win some and lose some. Hopefully we can get our hands on some balls and turn them over a few times. That differential should be enough. 

My top three players on the D this year have been Steven Parker, Eric Motherfuckin Striker and Charles Walker. I'm picking my DPOG from those three and I'm choosing Steven Parker. He's been awesome and his help in the passing game is going to be huge. 

THE SCORE

This will be fun. One team is going to ruin the others dreams. You couldn't ask for more from two teams and fan bases that truly loathe one another. 

The Sooners are a team that's running downhill right now. This game is last jewel in their amazing November run. There is a revenge factor after last year. Bob Stoops had his worst game as coach. The Cowboys can't match what's about to come. 

Sooners 35 Cowboys 17

Boomer to the motherfuckin Sooner

Oklahoma State (aka Bedlam)

Stillwater, a tiny little butthole on the map of America. Known for a bar with the most delicious (and diarrhea inducing) cheese fries I've ever had, and a college football team built on one lunatic billionaires oil money. The Sooners travel a little ways down the road today and take on this football team with the highest of stakes at hand. OSU lost last week to Baylor, that takes a little of the glimmer off of this one in the national eye, but does nothing to diminish what OU has to play for. The Sooners magical run through November has us old guys reminiscing about Red October waaaaay back in 2000 (credit: Steve Mitchell). But the far away looks in our eyes will be quickly gouged out if the Sooners lay an egg today. In short, win and the Sooners are making the Big 12's first trip to the new college playoff with everything in front of them. Lose, and it's another second tier bowl game, dripping with the scraps of what might have been.

Offense

That game last Saturday was an absolute butthole destroyer. You couldn't have forced a single hydrogen atom out of my ass with a blow torch. It confirmed what no one ever had any doubts about, Trevor Knight is shit (read on, he won't be my OPG pick), and Samaje Perine is a man playing against boys. Basically, Baker Mayfield is the only hope OU has. Thankfully, at last check, he will play. The previous few sentences make it hard to not pick him as OPG. After all, the offense is a Chevy Corsica with corn syrup in the tank without him. I like Mayfield to account for 4 TD's today and cement himself as a top Heisman contender.

Defense

Oh boy, the defense. A game that should've been over at halftime forced my dramatic butthole sentence earlier after allowing a 3rd string TCU QB to get the Horned Frogs back in it. Granted, after the Pu Pu Platter that Knight served, they were on the field roughly 97% of the half, but still. OSU has never had trouble scoring, and they will definitely get theirs today. I think it all starts up front (like I always do), and I like Charles "Ass" Tapper to have another huge day. This guy went from possible UFA roster spot to mid round draft choice in the last 5 weeks. To summarize, he's been a terror. I like him for 2 sacks today and countless pressures

Score

This is for all of the marbles. After that texas game, who would have ever thought it possible? Not me, for one. Literally everything is still on the table, playoffs (playoffs?) or the whocares.com bowl. I'm feeling the former. OSU will score, the crowd will be apeshit, but the Mayfield and the defense will lead us to the promise land in a scorcher. Sooners take it 41-40. I've got two more pieces in me this season.

Boomer to the MOTHERFUCKIN Sooner

Bedlam

On paper this one could be a complete fisting. OSU is riding high after the Baylor win and the Sooners, while close, still aren't completely sure what they bring to the table any given week. Here's what I'm hoping has happened. The Sooners have rested, healed and improved after their most complete win of the season. They've put together an offensive gameplan that takes advantage of what they do well. Hopefully the Cowboys have come back to earth a little bit. It's hard to imagine them putting together another game like Baylor. Maybe they are even a smidge overconfident. This is a team that lost to West Virginia and I don't give a damn who was or was not on the field for them at the time.

This game is almost the same scenario as OU-Baylor. On the road against a team that appears unstoppable. OU was in that one for a while. The D played lights out and the O flat sucked. Same thing could happen here but I don't think it will.

OFFENSE

The re-insertion of Trevor Knight has done "wonders" for the offense. Rather than second guess why he was ever pulled (he stunk) or why it took so long to put him back in (Bell had to stink worse), let's just be thankful that he's in there and the offense has the closest thing to an identity as they can hope to muster this year.

It's run baby run now and that somewhat negates the Cowboy's secondary, arguably their strength. If the run game can be effective it also keeps the Cowboys off the field and nothing need be said about the benefits of that.

I'm going DD Williams here. I kid I kid. It has to be Trevor Knight. There is legit pressure on him to do well. He has to take care of the ball and make plays. Even if the run-game is the focal point he'll probably need to find more than four receivers though. Man, wouldn't it be nice if a football team had a big target? The kind of guy who can block one play and streak across the field underneath the D or settle in a hole in the zone as a secondary receiver/safety valve the next? What would you call that position if it existed? Seems like that would help a guy like ol' Trevor.

DEFENSE

Same shit, different day here. They need some help from the offense and they have to be big on 3rd down. They can't give the Pokes first downs by penalty.

OSU will have some razzle dazzle and they'll score and score and score. If the Sooners bring their A-Game on D though they can be in this thing.

I've thought long and hard about this and I'm going with Aaron Motherfuckin Colvin. His career is winding down and he'll want to win his final bedlam. No point trying to pick cute. I know he's dinged up with a "shoulder" but he'll leave that damn thing laying lifeless and bloody on the field if need be.

THE SCORE

What? Over? Did you say "over"? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!

Seriously. We have a chance here to wreck some fucking Poke dreams. We could see icicle tears on coed faces. By god there is something to play for and it's called stomping little brothers dick in the dirt.

We play good football and both sides of the ball (longshot) we can beat these guys. We will play good football on both sides of the ball and we will beat these guys.

OU 27 OSU 17

Boomer to the motherfuckin Sooner

Bedlam

Good Saturday to you Sooners fans. I am writing this post from Vietnam where the wife and I have been vacationing for the past two weeks. It's a beautiful place to visit with great food if you're interested. However, I've been calling everyone I meet Charlie and am repeatedly met with blank looks. I've paid little attention to the sporting world, but I'm pretty sure I have all of the evidence I need from the season to know what is going to happen in this one. A few weeks ago our beloved Sooners went on the road against an undefeated Baylor squad. We hung tough for a quarter and a half or so and then proceeded to get shat on in nearly every phase of the game. This same Baylor team recently got punished in embarrassing fashion by the very O-State Cowboys we stand to face. I'm not a huge believer in this who-beat-who transferring from week to week, so I'm hopeful here if not doubtful. It will take our best game of the season to avoid a repeat of 2011.

Offense

Once again I'm trying to think of what to do here and am not coming up with much. I did read that Keith Ford has a chance to see the field again this week. I like the strategy of burning a year of eligibility for 20 snaps on the season. I'm doubtful he'll do enough to garner an MVP worthy performance, at least not by this blog's lofty standards. I'm going to go out on a limb here and go with Trevor Knight. I realize this basically condemns him to a terrible game but if I'm right then I think we hang around in this one. He's going to have to create more with his legs and hit a few shots down field. Otherwise, it's going to be a long day for this soft turd of an offense.

Defense

Another crapshoot here. Though I did like Dominique Alexander's play last week when Mitch and I both picked him. I think our best hope defensively is getting good pressure up front. If Chelf has all day to throw, our DB's will be putting on a live action performance of the hit Broadway musical "Smeared Britches". So I'm going with Chaz Ass Tapper today. We need him to be a force and I feel that he will come through.

Score

I'll be on a plane when this one plays out, a quick 26 hour jaunt all told. So I'll be blissfully ignorant of the outcome for a while. But let's suffice it to say that this has me awfully nervous. Like having-terrible-diarrhea-and-doing-nude-jumping-jacks-on-white-carpet nervous. As much as I hate to say it, we are the inferior team in this one. That's hard to write down. But, as is always the case this game tends to play closer than it should when one team is clearly better. I think OU hangs around, gets some big plays on special teams with Roy and Jalen, and the defense plays a complete game. With those things in mind, a couple of turnovers going our way and if you squint and tilt your head just right, you can see an OU win. It's not much to hang your hat on but it's enough and that's what the Sooners have today, enough. OU pulls out a squeaker here and wins it 31-30.

Boomer to the Motherfuckin' Sooner.

Bedlam 2012

OU is finishing up a run against the best offenses in the Big 12. So far, these offenses are who we thought they were. Baylor was savvy but, ultimately, not game. West Virginia was the most potent five-loss (at the time) team you are likely to see. Now it's OSU. Frankly, I fear them the most.

Conversely, the Sooner Defense is no longer who we thought they were. Sometimes statistics don't tell the whole story. Last week it did. The Sooner D at West Virginia was the worst defensive effort in Sooner history. They have been exposed and embarrassed for two weeks. Last week against West Virginia they needed someone, anyone, to step up. Landry Jones of all people bailed them out by playing one hell of a football game.

Speaking of, it's Senior Day for Landry Jones, the most polarizing player of the Bob Stoops era. A QB who re-wrote virtually all record books at OU and yet, the most readily criticized and vilified. Most praise heaped on him is deserved. When he's good he's great.

But much of his criticism is deserved as well.

I will argue forever that he leaves 150 passing yards on the field almost every game. These yards came in the form of interceptions for sure. But more often, it was a terrible swing pass or, worse, locking onto a receiver and ignoring/completely missing a more open target.

Ah well. He won a hell of a lot of football games and I really want him to win three more starting today. I hope next year I don't utter the words, "I wish we still had Landry Jones".

OFFENSE

At home, on Senior Day, against a rival, I expect the Sooners to come out humming like a sewing machine. Only a depleted offensive line can stop it completely.

The Cowboy defense is decent at best but shouldn't be able to hold the Sooners to less than 30. Shutting down Kansas and Iowa State does not make them a defensive juggernaut. No way they can stop the OU receiving corps. Will they be able to get pressure on Landry?

Kenny Fuckin Shitbag is going to pick the offensive unit up on his shoulders and make sure the Seniors, and particularly Landry, go out in style. This is the closest I can come to picking Landry. I like Kenny for 150 today.

DEFENSE

The Sooner defense is dead to rights for these last three games of the season and they know it. The Cowboys, regardless of who the Sooners face in a bowl, are the most lethal.

Joseph Randle could run for 300 yards. I guarantee Cowboy receivers will be running across the middle all day. The Cowboys are not near the levels of the last two years but they can pile up the points.

On the other hand, the Sooners have pride and legacies are at stake. 

What can the Sooners do? They can start making plays at the point of attack or they can change the scheme up a bit. Both seem difficult to do at this stage of the season. Things are a bit hard-baked by now.

I'll take my chances and hope that players will start making plays. It appears to be near impossible for coaches at this level to change schemes. I'm taking Senior DeMontre Hurst. Not that he'll have the most chances to make plays at the point of attack. He's just the most trustworthy not to screw up and he takes away half the field. He's been as solid as any DB in the Stoops era. He's had his position on lockdown for four years and no one has challenged him. He's about the only player you can trust over there these days.

THE SCORE

Of all the teams, nobody schemes on offense like the Cowboys. Of all teams, they are least respectful of the Sooners. If it can be said that anyone occupies time in Bob Stoops' headspace, it's Mike Gundy. In short, OU should be very concerned.

The Defense has been so sieve-like that the Offense might not be able to keep up. Is it possible the Sooner D is this bad? Is it possible to right the ship? Of course it is. And there's no better time than today.

Sooners 42 Cowboys 38 in a barn burner.

Boomer to the Motherfuckin Sooner

Oklahoma State

Bedlam is back for it's 2012 incarnation, pitting the Sooners against inferiority complex saddled OSU. At one point this might have been the most lopsided "rivalry" in history. OSU had beaten OU something like 4 times since WW2 to around 2000. Recent years however, have shown much more parity. From the Rashaun Woods game that was a fluke to last year's assbeat in Stoolwater, the Sooners have had much fuller hands with the pokes than any Sooner fan would like. Speaking of last year's embarrassment, I'm hoping the team has a little payback on their mind. Lonnie was never more Lonnie than that game last season, it's his chance for atonement.

OSU comes in with a pretty solid defense which is out of character. Their offense is good as usual. They've lost three on the season and apart from losing to what seems to be a terrifically bad Texas squad, they've been pretty good. It will be a tough test and if we bring the same defense that we brought last week there are going to be a lot of unhappy people in Sooner nation after the game. I'm not going to spend time rehashing that game. While a lot of fun to watch, my coronaries and my sphincter aren't up for a repeat. Suffice it to say, the Sooner defense doesn't seem to be much better than last year, if at all. I'm hoping for a little ball control offense to limit OSU's possessions and maybe we can sneak it out that way.

Offense

I went for Justin Brown last week, hindsight shows that Stills would have been the guy. What a game by Fuckin' Shitbag. Mitch went for Damien Williams who had a really nice night also. I would be happy with either of those two repeating this week. But I'm going a little different route today. I'm going with the forgotten man, Trey Millard (can we agree that Millard is the overwhelming favorite to be a beast in the NFL leaving everyone wondering why we never gave him the fucking ball while at OU?). I'm not sure why he doesn't get the ball more, I guess because there are only so many touches to go around with all of our weapons. Nonetheless he's probably the most difficult matchup we have and he rarely gets touches. Just a hunch, but I think that Heupel remembers him in this one and he steps up big.

Defense

I should just start drawing a name out of hat, because I'm essentially doing that now. In light of the fact that he's a Senior and just that he's one of my favorite players on the team, I'm going with Casey Walker. I hope he crushes their QB at least once, and I'm hoping by the end that he's been in the backfield enough that they're looking for him in their huddle.

Score

I'm nervous. Our D couldn't be looking worse right now. They can score, and actually play solid D. That said, I like that this is a home game, the first in two years it should be noted. I'm sure Sooner fans are ready. I am hopeful that the players are still gargling to get the taste of last year out of their mouths. Nothing will wash it away better than a thorough drubbing. I think it will be close, but I think revenge + home crowd is enough that we get it done. Sooners take this one 38-28 in a tough one.


Boomer to the Motherfuckin' Sooner

Oklahoma Sooners 2012 Schedule Preview

It's opening week and the nadir of hope and optimism.  Time to foist the crimson-est of crimson colored glasses onto your chubby happy cheeks.

On the eve of their epic quest for glory, let us take a walk through this rainbow filled glen and look ahead at each opponent the Sooners will annihilate.

September 1st, 2012 at University of Texas - El Paso
The last time the Sooners played a Mike Price coached team it was a PlayStation performance for the defense in the Rose Bowl against Washington State. Virtually every unit on offense and defense needs to work the kinks out. I, like everyone else, am keenly interested to see how the defense looks.

September 8th, 2012 Florida A&M
I heard tell that the famous Florida A&M band was not making the trip to Norman for this one. Hopefully it's an ugly, vicious rumor. Else, why schedule this one? I suppose it will satisfy the blood thirst. Also, it will make me pop a vein in my forehead to see the empty seats in the student section.

September 22nd, 2012 Kansas State
This will be a decent test I suppose. If nothing else the Sooners should be tuned up by this point and good and healthy.

October 6th, 2012 at Texas Tech
Revenge Game. Tech always is a tough place to play. There's something about that Tommy Tuberville I just don't like. He's got an arrogance like he's playing chess vs. checkers since he came from the SEC. In short, he's a jerkoff and I hope we shit down their throats.

October 13th, 2012 Texas, at Dallas
Not worried. As long as Mack is suckling on the teat of some pre-Madonna QB's Mama and promising playing time for her blond-hair blue-eyed kiddo the Sooners have this in the bag.

October 20th, 2012 Kansas
Charlie Weis inherits what might possibly be the largest dearth of talent in Division 1 (or whatever it's called today). A perfect tune-up for Notre Dame.

October 27th, 2012 Notre Dame
This is one of the most highly anticipated non-conference games that I can remember. Every one and their dog has this date circled on the calendar as the "game they are going to". I hate giving any credit to Notre Dame (backhanded compliment alert!) because they are so overrated but the name still does carry massive cache'. Also, the Sooners have a hard time against them. Sooner Magic has historically been trumped by the Luck of the Irish. There are only two (!) home games worth a shit this year and this is the first.

November 3rd, 2012 at Iowa State
Potential letdown game after the whipping of the Irish. One thing Iowa State does is play hard. The Sooners will be a battle-tested fine tuned machine by now though. This is also the point in the season where, in recent years, the Sooners have been undefeated but still manage to come out flat. It is the bane of my existence and I do not want to see it this year.

November 10th, 2012 Baylor
Revenge game. I also have to believe that a Robert Griffin the 3rd-less Baylor team is a neutered Baylor team. Also, the defense can not be nearly as porous as last year. Plus it's at home. Plus it's a revenge game. Also, it's at this point in the season when I start thinking Brent Venables needs to be fired. Looking forward to not worrying about that.

November 17th, 2012 at West Virginia
Well everyone thinks this one will be huge. It will almost certainly have a deep conference impact. Of course there is also the novelty of West Virginia's entrance into the Big 12. You couldn't pay me to travel to Morgantown as a fan of the visiting team. As an Oklahoman we can make fun of about 5 states. West Virginia tops the list.

November 24th, 2012 Oklahoma State
All roads to glory lead home. Revenge game. Cowboys fans are drinking the Kool-Aid hard by already trying to convince themselves that their true Freshman Quarterback has all the skills (plus he's a better athlete) than 28 year old Brandon Weeden. I also overhead someone trying to seriously assert that some WR (really the name is irrelevant) is better in all phases of the game than Justin Blackmon. Puff Puff Give you HIGH motherfucker.

PS this is the other home game that's worth pissing on.

December 1st, 2012 at Texas Christian 
TCU's roster got decimated by some hard working Christians on the roster had their highly profitable pot-ring busted. But they need to be taken seriously. Especially when they are the only thing standing in the way of perfection.

Up next we'll discuss the 2012 MFer award and we'll throw a few team oriented predictions out there as well.

Bedlam

Bedlam. It sucks that this one isn't "the most important football game in Oklahoma history". Though, for OSU, it still is. As I've snarkily pointed out to every Poke fan I know this week, all the hopes and dreams of Cowboys fans and players are right there in front of them. Manifest Destiny and all that.

A Cowboy win would mean the first Big 12 Championship in school history (and the first outright conference championship since prohibition). The first BCS bid in school history. An outside shot at the first title game in school history.

Noooooo pressure.

That sound you just heard was the collective puckering of Poke buttholes.

All season long OSU had the mental advantage in this one. If there is one silver lining to the Sooners losing two games and being out of contention for the title it's that they now have, hopefully, a mental edge.

OU is now the underdog with nothing to lose. Everyone has written them off. They seem destined for a craptacular bowl game. But with one more spectacular effort they can rip the guts out of Little Brother on their own field.

No Big 12 Championship. No BCS. No title shot.

Sooner fans have to hope that the same Sooner team that showed up at Florida State, Texas and Kansas State will show up in Stillwater. Regrettably, this years Sooner squad has played to the level of its competition. Please God let them rise to the occasion today.

OFFENSE

It's Landry Jones. I hope he leaves for the NFL. He is the penultimate system QB. He leaves 120 yards on the table every week with his terrible screen passes. But we need him today. We really need him to not shit his pants and to not make inexplicably awful decisions. Make smart decisions, easy throws and let the run game do the heavy lifting. All he has to do is manage the game because the unit under the gun in this one is the defense.

DEFENSE

Great Oden's Beard these bastards need to show up today. OSU wants to turn the ball over. They love it. Brandon Weeden is not averse to making terrible decisions. Justin Blackmon made one of the dumbest football plays I've ever seen against Texas A&M and is not immune to fumbling. Joseph Randle really likes being careless with the football.

The Sooner D needs to embrace these tendencies. What they don't need to do is let the Pokes run roughshod or let receivers get behind the safeties. In general they should not give up the "Big Play". Unfortunately, they've done just that in spades all year long.

The Sooners will sorely miss Ronnel "The Hammer" Lewis. Now I'm hearing Big Frank Alexander might be out. Um, that sucks.

I'm going for Tom Wort. He's been playing well. Maybe he can get some pressure on Weeden. I think that's the key. Maybe Venables blitzes with Tommy. I actually feel pretty good about this.

THE SCORE

I'm really, really hoping for a defensive score for the Sooners. I think Landry can get a couple TD throws. Jaz Hands Reynolds will be back so that will be a huge help. The run game has been pretty stellar at times recently. I think the Sooners can get 35. That should be enough to win. But....

The D has given up big plays all season long. It's unfortunately their stock and trade. So, count on the Cowboys getting a few. Likewise, Landry could do something dumb and hand the Pokes a score on a platter. I think they take advantage.

Also, Bobby is 6-0 versus Mike "I'm a Man!" Gundy in season ending games. This fact is not lost on the Poke faithful. They are legitimately afraid of Bobby.

OU 35, OSU 24

Oh boy, this one's big. Boomer to the Motherfuckin Sooner.

Bedlam...Nuff Said

I have good news. I visited the oracle this morning and the oracle says OU victory. By oracle, I mean I had one of the most fulfilling shits in recent memory. Pretty much a courtesy wipe and a lingering feeling of bliss (at least half an hour) in my gut. Had it been a scatalogical nightmare (read: double-digit wipes) I'd have a sense of doom.

There are other signs that should make Sooner fans feel good. Both Desmond Howard and Lee Corso picked OSU. Desmond Howard might be the dumbest "analyst" on television. Lee Corso is, as we all know, a jinx and blithering asshat.

On GameDay this morning, the tension within the OSU crowd was palpable. They stood, stone silent as the crew made their picks. There were signs saying, "No Poke Choke". Okay, when your legacy is choking and you feel compelled to make a sign trying to reverse-jinx said legacy, it tells me your head is in a bad place.

My broham, Navin, is in full-bore Doomsday McGoo mode. This always lifts my spirits.

Finally, this is one of those rare occasions where the Sooners find themselves in the underdog role. The theme of this week has been that the OSU offense is unstoppable, the Sooner defense is a sieve. OSU is at destiny's doorstep. This is the biggest game in the history of their program. This is already the winningest season in their program's history (chortle). So Bobby and the Sooners have a chance to, A) silence critics by beating a top-10 team on the road B) said top-10 team is an in-state rival, C) a trip to the Big 12 Championship is on the line and D) the week's conversation has been nothing other than this is OSU's championship to lose, not OU's chance to win.

I think the Sooners will be "focused".

There are two keys to the game (from a Sooner perspective and that's all we're interested in). First, can Landry Jones not crap his jock? Dear please God say yes. Two, can the Sooner D-Line get to Weeden? He does not like to run. In theory, this should bode well for the Sooners.

The Picks

Offense

On offense I can not justify picking anyone other than DeMarco Murray. I just can't. The man is on a mission and today that mission is to make Cowboy fans remember this as the game where DeMarco Murray ran roughshod up and down the field and ripped our collective hearts out.

Defense

I'm sticking with my theory and picking the best player on that side of the ball. I'm with Navin. That player is Tony Jefferson. I want to pick someone on the D-Line. I want to pick someone like Casey Walker because my father-in-law says he's back and will be a tremendous help. But this is not the day to step out on a very slender limb. I have to go with our best here.

Conclusion

I'll be in attendance with my main man Robbie. I hope our karmic levels are high. If the Sooners win I cannot wait to feel the hopes and dreams of 55,000 poke fans vanish into the ether. If the Sooners lose I'll make my escape quickly whilst some pencil-dicks get maced by the Oklahoma Highway Patrol as they try to take down the goalposts. Dear God let the Sooners win.

Final Score: OU 38, OSU 31

Boomer to the motherfuckin' Sooner