OSU

Well, here we are again. Another season where expectations failed to be met, and we sit on the cusp of another conference championship. I guess I'm a bit arrogant thinking this isn't enough, after all my freshman year we won two games (waaayyy back). In other words it could be worse I guess. None of it changes the fact that we have to win on the road at Stillwater for the second year in a row with the conference on the line. Seems tough.

OSU seems to do everything well that we struggle against, namely throw it a shitload for a ton of yardage and points. Nevermind that their QB has been able to buy the team beer since most of them were in junior high, their good regardless. As much as like to make fun of his age, he's been damn good this year and so is their offense in general. Our best hope is to win a shootout again, and with the weapons we've lost I'm not sure we can. It will be awfully hard for us to score enough given our defenses performance against offenses of this type. Lonnie will need to play two halves like the first one he played against Texas for us to have a chance. If that happens the rivers may run backwards and my jockey's may be permanently stained.

OSU losing to Iowa State does not help us at all. The fact that this is their first game since then further defecates on our chances. I sure hope we can do this, but make no mistake, this is the best team we've played all season and they've got revenge on their minds from last season. In other words, all of the intangible "if I were betting on this game" chips go in their favor. I don't like it one bit. I just hope Bobby can mindfuck Gundy enough again to pull this thing out.

Offense

I'm at a loss here. There are many limbs I'd like to go out on, but I'm scared shitless I'll jinx that player into oblivion and we won't hear from the all day, or worse they'll have a leg amputated on the 34 (I'm fucking crazy, FYI). I'd like to say Shitbag, I really would. But let's be honest, he hasn't exactly taken the leadership role and ran with it. If anyone has stepped up, I have to say it's Roy Finch. He's played well, and honestly I'm not sure anyone on the team goes as hard each down as him. He's the anti-Sooner this season. He gets more out of himself than anyone else. As a result, I'm spitting in the wind here and going against my jinx prophecy. It's Finch today for OU. I think he catches a few passes, makes something out of nothing more than once, and even picks up some tough yards on short plays. Please let me be right.

Defense

Here, I've been going to the same well for most of the year, save the last few games. Perhaps not coincidentally our defense has been suspect ever since I started going to different "wells" in order to make "smarter" picks and mix things up (did I mention I often masturbate in my own feces?). With that arousing image dancing in your cerebrum, I shift back to my bread and butter this week. It's too important, and I really can't fault myself for going with who I think has been the best defensive player in the conference, Big Frank. (can we agree, with two games left in his career, that he's just Big Frank? Can we? No really, can we?). I think Big Frank is rainboot deep in Weeden's crusty ass all day. I think I get an inappropriate erection that I have to "hide" in my waistband more than once. I like this idea very much.

Overall, I have my doubts here. I've never been this pessimistic (hard to believe) about a Bedlam game. In my memory, this is the most overmatched we've been going in, or equally matched, whatever you choose. It will take our best effort from every aspect of the game, and we'll have to play our most complete game of the season. Anything less, and we'll spend the next year hearing about this again. I'm not sure what I really think, but I'm going with OU. I have no choice. I'm a hopeless optimist with this team, and it will never change. We are talented enough and if it wasn't for years of being letdown at the most unsuspecting times I'd be downright confident. Enough. OU wins it, barely, 31-28.

Let's get out there and roll some fucking heads.

Boomer to the Motherfuckin' Sooner.