Colorado

I'll be honest, I'm having trouble getting my heart in this one. After beating us last week, Mizzou is shitting all over themselves in Nebraska right now. This basically confirms that the entire offseason was built around the theme, "Ruin Oklahoma's Season". Content with that result MU will likely proceed to lose 2-3 more games adding ammunition to the media's already loaded pistol that we aren't for real. In all fairness, we aren't for real. Our defense is piss poor.  

I want to say that we'll have revenge on our mind this week after losing last week and losing at Colorado a few years back. However, that's really a pipe dream. I imagine us coming out feeling entitled and going through the motions. I don't think we will pound these guys as much as I would like that. With the collective "vibe" here at the Steamroller officially being set on disgust, I move on to the picks.

Offense

I don't really know who to pick here, but I'm certainly not going with Lonnie. I'm beginning to have a strong distaste for the lad who appears physically incapable of playing in the clutch or anytime on the road. I hope for his sake that after he graduates he's never faced with needing to pray a busload of children off of an icy cliff because that's a certain tragedy and will likely bring in to question his ability to spread the gospel. I'm rambling, but suffice it to say that I'm fed up with him and the ministry plans only add to my general dislike for him. In that light, I am going to go with Roy Finch this week. I think he gets a serious taste of the football this week and I think he shines under the home lights. 

Defense

If I was unsure on the offensive side of the ball who to pick, I'm fucking baffled here. Nobody seems to step up, and Quinton Carter is quickly flying up to the top of most egregious MF award winners in our history. He's solid, but he hasn't dropped my jaw in some time. Although, on this defense solid basically is as good as it gets so maybe he's the right choice. What the hell, I'm going with him this week. Just decided it in this last sentence. I like him for a pick and shitload of tackles. 

I hate the multigenerational Hawkins attack as it beat us in embarrassing fashion the last time we met. I think they'll throw the playbook at us. But I imagine the talent discrepancy is too much for them to overcome on the road. I think we unimpressively win this at home. Like Mitch, I'm not confident and I think if it were in Boulder I'd be more worried. I think we do enough to win, Sooners take it 27-17.

Boomer to the Motherfuckin' Sooner

No Longer on Suicide Watch, Ready for Colorado

I don't have what it takes to revisit what happened in Columbia last week. Two reasons for this. First, I drank myself to bolivian and details are mercifully sketchy. Two, I don't watch game tape of losses. Let's just forget it and move on to what might be the most poorly attended home game in the Bob Stoops era (It's trick-or-treat night and the game won't be over until midnight). I'm hoping that at the very least some sluttily dressed co-eds decide to show for some pregame revelry.

I don't care if there are only 10 people there though, the Sooners better have a fire lit under their collective asses. Redemption is the only cure for yet another mistake-riddled offensive effort and an adjustmentless (pretty sure I just made this up) defensive gameplan on national television. Why do we use the national stage to play like assholes (Big 12 Championship games excepted)?

I'm scared nonetheless. Colorado is like a cornered and wounded dog. Perhaps more lapdog than Pit Bull but still. You never know what a team with a coach on the hotseat and nothing to lose is capable of. The good news is, of course, the game is in Norman. Also, Coach Dan Hawkins's son Cody is at QB. He sucks (even if he led the Buffs to victory in Boulder a few years back). These are advantages that cannot be overstated.

The Picks

Offense

I don't necessarily like a Lonnie pick here but I'm going to do it anyway. He needs to get back on track and fast. As we said at the beginning of the season, he's the key to the whole thing. Lots of things can happen around the country and the Sooners need a Lonnie that's right in the head the rest of the way. If I had to pick somewhere other than Lonnie I'd say Roy Finch only because I'm fully plugged in to that hype machine.

Defense

I was going to say I hope it's someone from the secondary but I think it's more important for someone from the line to, you know, maybe touch the quarterback this week. I'll say Jeremy Beal then because he's the only real choice here. He needs to set the tone and be the leader of that unit.

The Score

I'm just not real confident about this one. Still, I don't see how Colorado can hold our offense down at home (of course I didn't think we could shit ourselves to the extent we did last week either). Who knows what kind of defensive effort there will be. These guys should be so much better than the 80th ranked defense in the country. It makes no sense to me. Still, that's what they are. I imagine the coaching staff hung out in the shoulder pads of that whole group this week though and maybe they'll be eager to prove they aren't terrible. Of course I'm the biggest homer ever so I'm assuming the best in all cases.


OU 35 Colorado 17

Digging Through the Shit We Just Stepped In

Well, last week fucking sucked. As much as I had a bad feeling about it, I didn't want that feeling to be founded. It all but ends our national championship hopes and really changes the feel for a season that was beginning to have a pretty good one. Credit Missouri, they played a good game and didn't make many mistakes. Certainly not as many as we did in continuing our trend of the last few years and putting our worst foot forward on the biggest stage. Big Game Bob is about as current as a Mondale Ferraro campaign bumpersticker. I don't know that I can think of anyone who so solidly earned a nickname only to do a complete 180 in their career. Anyway, we've more or less discussed this before it just gets pretty old. I'm not sure what is tougher, having expectations that are never lived up to or having no expectations and exceeding them. I guess being a contender is the outwardly better way to go and probably what I would ultimately pick. Attending OU during the John Blake era makes it hard to want the alternative. However, as a Royals fan I almost get a sick pleasure out of expecting to lose, it's the fantasy of someday being relevant and it being that much sweeter. I guess the thing that bothers me the most is that I know we have the talent to win these games (OU I mean) and yet I expect to lose, or at the very least escape. I could run around this circle all day, but I'll cut it off here.

As for the game itself, we picked the worst possible week (and least survivable game) to play our worst game of the season. We knew we would get their best shot and while we weathered the early storm, we played to our season form and did absolutely nothing defensively in the fourth quarter. The fact that we were even in the game (leading in fact!!) after the turnovers, drops, missed field goals etc. is  testament to the talent discrepancy between our teams. We absolutely should have won...but we didn't. The good news is this game reminds me a of a very specific game between the Denver Broncos and Pittsburgh Steelers in 1997. Denver was good that year, damn good in fact and so were the Steelers. However, in the general public's mind there was a general consensus that Denver was superior (I'm a huge Broncos fan). Denver played a road game late in the season with home field advantage on the line in Pittsburgh. Denver played generally terribly that game. There were key drops on 3rd downs, turnovers and all sorts of uncharacteristic shit that they did in the game and ended up losing. I knew, just knew, they were better than the Steelers. So later that season in the playoffs, Denver went back to Pittsburgh with the AFC championship on the line. I had absolutely no doubt they were going to win that game. I couldn't fathom another mistake riddled performance like I'd seen earlier in the season. Of course Denver went on to win that game and the Super Bowl.

I'm not saying that OU is 1998 Denver, or even the league relative equivalent of this year. I just have that same feeling and have had all week. The feeling that if we were to meet them down the road we would beat them. I guess the point of this long digression is that I hope Missouri wins out, and we do too because I'd love to get a chance to stomp their nuts in the Big 12 title game and I think that is exactly what would happen.

As for Missouri, good for them that they finally won a big one, as for all of the rampant shit talking, it's telling that the biggest win in their program history came in their 7th game of the year (I had to get a dig in, fuckers).

One final positive note, how about Roy Finch? I now see why the coaches couldn't wait to get him back. While not our most consistent or best back by any stretch, he's instantly the most electrifying and biggest home run threat. That's no small feat when your putting him up against Murray. The future may not be this season for OU, but these young guys that are playing now certainly make it look promising. Now if we could just get the middle of our D-Line fixed.

I'll be back this afternoon for a look at Colorado, I just wanted to get this up before we move on.

Missouri

Well, here we go in Columbia tonight. I really have a bad feeling about this one and have had all week. I think this is our toughest game all season, more than Texas even strictly because it's on the road. Also, even  though Cincy might as well have been a road game, technically that was a neutral site making this our first true road game. If you caught Gameday this morning the crowd looks to be for real (that was the biggest gameday turnout I can remember) and a day of pouring fuel (in this case: beer) on the fire will only make it that much rowdier. I think that Lonnie will struggle, and I think we will make some mistakes in the hurry up that you can credit the crowd for. I hope we can survive, because I absolutely can't envision handing them a beat down like we have in recent years.

All of that said, everyone has been talking all week about Mizzou's defense being number 2 and the matchup of that and our offense. No one seems to be mentioning our defense versus their offense. I think our defense is rounding in to form, and I think that is what will allow us win this game. Gabbert has been good but streaky, if we can force a couple of turnovers our offense will build on that momentum and that's the way we will get our points and keep them off of the field. I think we win today, because I always do, but I think we will struggle tremendously to pull this out. On to the picks...

Offense

I think today, as I've said roughly 1000 times, Lonnie will struggle. I see him turning the ball over at least once and for that reason I can't go with him (with that in mind, if he proves me wrong and takes over, then we win this one hands down). I think DeMarco has been talked about a lot this week, and I think he is the key to victory. I think the mix up of Mossis "my dog" Madu and Roy Finch takes a little pressure off DeMarco and as a result I think he adds to his TD record and carries us. I like DeMarco to break 100 on the ground and to make a few big catches out of the backfield. In doing so I think he emerges in the national spotlight some.

Defense

This is a huge road game, the sort of game that makes new stars (see: Tony Jefferson) and cements a players legacy. In that vein, I think it takes a veteran out there to really take over, block out all of the crowd and emotion, and dominate. I'm going with Travis "Old Steady" Lewis to have a big night. I think he quietly makes a dozen tackles, and not so quietly forces at least one turnover. He's ready, he's our most consistent defender, and he will step up.

I can't quit thinking back to the last time we went up to Mizzou, a game I attended with Mitchy, and how lucky we were to get out of there with a win. That team had Brad Smith who essentially owned us. They don't have a singular weapon like that now, but they are balanced, and for the first time in my memory they have a defense that seems half interested in stopping people. Those factors compounded with what I predict will be an absolutely insane crowd make this game a huge trap for us. There has been little of Mizzou's typical moronic smack talking, so I'm not sure we have the fire under us that we should (really hope I'm wrong there). However, as I said before, I think our defense carries us in this one and we win a low scoring affair late 17-14. I'm shitting bricks, but I have faith in our guys to step up in this one and shut rotten fuckfaces like Stewart Mandel and Desmond Howard (Corso kiss of death not withstanding) up. Let's destroy these shit fucks.

Boomer to the Motherfuckin' Sooner.

OU vs. The Mizz

I'll spare you the drama. I feel confident about this one. Not in a PlayStation domination sense but OU is the better squad. They have been tested both by the road and the competition. So yes, Mizzou is good, Columbia will be tough. But I believe Mizzou has more pressure on them. Or, they will be affected more easily by it. This will, in turn, lead to mistakes (dba turnovers). And turnovers, as any mouthbreather can attest, is the difference in games like this.

I do worry that the confidence Mizzou has in their defense could work in their favor if they have success early and they become buoyed by the crowd. The Mizzou offense could have some success against the OU defense. In fact, I'm certain they will.

Let's be real though. The OU offense is dynamic. I don't care how good Mizzou's defense is (and remember they have played NO ONE) they can't cover everyone on every play. Maybe OU won't run roughshod up and down the field all night but they will have their own share of success.

The question for OU's defense is whether or not they can get in Blaine Gabbert's head. If the D can't hit him can they at least make him rush his throws? It's not like Mizzou's offense is revolutionary. It isn't a one-off a la Air Force. Stopping Mizzou will come down to discipline in the secondary. Fortunately, the 2010 Sooner D seems to be pretty damn disciplined.

This game will be a bit of a shootout but OU is the better team across the board. I can't envision the Sooners getting rattled to the degree that the game gets out of reach. As the clock winds down and the pressure ratchets up, OU will show the value of having been there done that. Plus, the road team has the advantage of being afforded the "nothing to lose" mentality. So tell me in all seriousness how Mizzou wins?

The Picks

Offense
Losing DeJuan Miller for the season sucks. He was really coming into his own as a valuable possession receiver. Cameron Kenney will be replacing him and I'd love to tell you that Sooner Nation has confidence in him but I can't. This is a pretty big dropoff. Rather than Kenney stepping up (which is possible and would be awesome) I see Kenny "Fucking Shitbag" Stills stepping up. So I'm picking him for my offensive player. I would pick DeMarco Murray (and I'm sure he'll be quite deserving) but that's quickly becoming the easy way out.

Defense
I'm going with budding superstar and current badass, Tony Jefferson. All season long he's been beyond solid but this week he'll be in the running for Big 12 Player of the Week. He's going to be all over the place feasting on the spread offense. I'm feeling very good about this.

The Score
It's going to be close. There's going to be a lot of Offense. But in the end the Sooners come through.

OU 35 Mizzou 31

OU - ISU Hangover/Recap

Well, well, well, if it isn't our old friend Doomsday McGoo. I couldn't be more happy to see you. All is right in the universe.

The battle with Mizzou is going to be a huge test, no doubt. The Tigers bandwagon will be taking on new riders all week and this is a service to OU. I love how this is shaping up. The Sooners are healthy, confidence is sky high and everyone knows what is at stake. We'll hear nothing other than glowing reports of high energy, competitive practices and that the boys are ready to compete in a great way.

But before we set our sights on Saturday let's briefly recap the clinic that left Iowa State suckling hind teat.

Congrats to DeMarco Murray for passing Steve Owens for the all-time touchdown record. That is amazing. Murray is in rarefied air and, maybe it's just me, it seems like he's done all this fairly quietly. You'll get no argument from me that he's a badass. He broke a 40 year old record, overcame an injury plagued career and still has half a season left to add to his legacy. But if you polled Sooner fans would DeMarco make the list of top 5 OU running backs? Would people put him ahead of Billy Sims, Steve Owens, Joe Washington, AD, Greg Pruitt, BillyVessels, etc? He belongs somewhere in that group.

What of the gaudy numbers put up by Lonnie and Ryan Broyles? Lonnie 30-34 for 334 and half of those balls going Broyles's way for 182. Good grief. Iowa State sucks okay. But any Sooner fan should be quite pleased with anything that might give Lonnie as much confidence as possible. And what can you say about Broyles save that he's a badass.The ball he caught in traffic and the diving touchdown reception were both world class.

Roy Finch has something special. It's hard to compare him to anyone after a handful of carries but if I had to say anyone it would be Noel Devine. Finch is short and built like a brick shithouse. Lean more than a bowling ball. He has jets and gets to the second layer quickly. Then he's shifty and can finish with power. Considering he's been out 8 weeks with a foot injury he performed quite ably. Needless to say the future is bright.

Now on to Mizzou.

Navin Absent Pre-ISU: Shame of the City

I'm not sure what city I've referred to there, but if you get the loose (and obscure) movie reference there, then I guess it would be LA. I'm sheepishly showing my face here again after neglecting to post a pregame ISU breakdown. However, if the results are any indication I may never do one again. We absolutely destroyed ISU. I didn't get to see the game, solidifying speculative reports that I am indeed a shitty fan. I'm not sure how much it meant to dismantle ISU, but it was certainly nice to run away with one that we should have, rather than let them hang around all afternoon. Evidently the debut of Roy Finch was pretty promising, and the big 3 on offense came to play in what seems as though it was their most collectively complete performance this season. Now that I've served you a tall glass of ice cold crimson kool-aid, let me drop a brown in it.

Mizzou will be an extremely tough crowd. Being a native of the Show-Me state I'm familiar with the fan-base...generally a pretty fair weather crowd. That said, when the weather is good they come out strong and will be extremely loud and extremely hostile. As I predicted last week, this looks to be our toughest test yet. With Mizzou at #11 in the BCS currently and with ESPN bringing GameDay to Columbia for the first time this game is poised to derail our run at a conference and (dare I say) national title. Hopefully our defense has truly tightened things up as it appears they did last Saturday. If not, I don't think we win this game. We will absolutely struggle to score points, Lonnie will turn the ball over, and running the ball will be extremely difficult. Their collective hair will be on fire, especially if we are punting early. I've got a really bad feeling about this one. I'm not saying I think we can't win, or that we'll lose, but it's going to be a very different game than last week. Stakes are extremely high, we're wearing that #1 bullseye and Mizzou is much better defensively than the teams we destroyed in 2007 and 2008. More to come this week, but I hope we spent part of our off-week preparing for these guys. We'll need everything we can get.

Doomsday McGoo: The Return.

OU - Iowa State

I couldn't give two craps about this game. Iowa State blows. Ames is probably the least attractive destination in the Big 12. I would never travel to see a game there.

I suppose there are a couple intriguing story lines. Much ballyhooed RB Roy Finch will be playing today. Someone on the team (too lazy to try to find it) said that his moves are Reggie Bush-esque. That sound you heard was the button flying off the front of my pants. A new weapon for the offense? Yes please.

The other thing we need to see is some attitude. The boys are fresh off a bye and huge win. They are in control of their own destiny. There is no excuse for not being "up" for this game. Even if it is Iowa State.

One last note on the Cyclones. When I went to the Big 12 basketball tournament a couple of years ago I had the misfortune of seeing the ISU cheer squad up close. Holy smokes was that a roster of fug. I couldn't believe a Division 1 program from a premier conference could have so little "talent".

On with the picks.

Offense
I'm riding the DeMarco train. I am a believer. He's got to be feeling confident after the texas game and now with the young pup Finch pushing him, I see him going off again today. I certainly am enamored with the idea anyways. I'm kind of feeling a kick return also.

Defense
I don't have a strong feeling on anyone here. I'll go with Travis "Old Steady" Lewis. He'll get his usual tackle numbers but perhaps he gets an INT or a fumble recovery.

Conclusion
The Sooners need to play with some fire and show they understand where they are on the college football landscape (contending for the GD title). They need to throttle these losers. And I believe they will. It's TCB Saturday for the Sooners.

OU 52, ISU 17

Schedule Glance

Before I get too worked up for this ISU game on Saturday, I thought I'd do a brief (see: half-assed) look ahead at what we have left on the schedule and try to identify which games I think will be our toughest.

We start the second half of the schedule against ISU at home. I think we may come out a tad rusty but I think we have enough to beat these guys even with a little rust. They've shown they can score some points which doesn't necessarily bode well in light of our wont to give up points, but I'm really hoping that our defense starts to solidify this week and we can win one where the fan base's collective assholes might be relaxed enough to let out a popcorn fart in the fourth quarter. I think that Colorado and Tech are very winnable seeing as they are at home (and they aren't that good). Further, I think we'll win down in A&M this year as well. Traditionally a tough place to get a win, Kyle Field has not been the tough out it used to be in recent years.

The stumbling blocks I see are Mizzou first and foremost. For whatever reason these guys act like beating us is the end goal for every football team at any level. Plus, we've had struggles winning at their place in the past (read: Chris Chester fake field goal TD catch) when the disparity in talent was greater than it is now. Plus, they've been left with a pretty shitty taste in their mouth as we've dismantled them at our place and in the Big 12 game when Chase "fatty" Daniels led the best Mizzou team in decades against us. We haven't even beaten ISU yet and this one scares me. Doomsday McGoo is already fully geared for this one.

I think that the Baylor and OSU games are also scary. Baylor is quite a bit better than they usually are and possess precisely the type of QB we generally can't stop. Not looking forward to that one at all from a game standpoint. However, coming in from the good mojo network, I recently learned I'll be sitting down with my co-author (presumably over many beers) to watch this one together. That alone has me anticipating this game more than any other at this point. Finally, OSU is always tough, they always are harder to play us than we are them, it's at their place, they have some talent etc. etc. I never feel great about that game, but if they remain unbeaten until we play them (unlikely) it will be on in Stoolwater and we will have to weather a serious storm.

All in all, we've got a pretty tough road ahead despite everyone in the media assuming we're cake walking to the Big 12 game. It's not an easy road by any stretch and 4 of the 7 are on the road where we haven't been great lately. I hope the young guys are figuring it out and we get the weak points buffed out in anticipation of the stretch run. People are talking about us having played the toughest schedule in country of the remaining unbeaten teams up to now, I think it's a fair argument. In that vein, I can only imagine the clamoring that is already starting about how we're getting screwed and should be ranked higher etc. Bottom line, is we've got a long way to go and so does everyone else. We are (at least) three very tough games and four games that aren't easy away from even getting a shot at the conference title. Let's whip ISU this weekend and then get ready for a tough trip to Columbia.

More about ISU before the game this weekend.

The OU-texas Post-Coital Embrace

Now let's not start sucking each others popsicle's just yet. The toppling of texas was a fine win. Sure, the Sooners are 5-0 and it's true they might have their most difficult games already behind them. It's also true that championship teams (there's that word) must also avoid key injuries and have its fair share of luck. We must remember the season is far from over, there's lots that can happen.

However, come October 16th, the next time the Sooners take the field, the college football world will have been shaken up. I don't mean to pretend to be Nostradamus, that's just the way things work. The Sooners play host to a perpetually hapless Iowa State team at night at Owen Field and, afterward, the Sooners will be undefeated and still in control of their own destiny. The Sooners will be a bona fide contender (!).

How about that Sooner Magic? Thank goodness it has reared its glorious head because the Sooners seem to be hell bent on giving games away. The fake kick? I wouldn't make that call on the PlayStation. What about the inability to execute a time-wasting, game clinching drive? Hell, how about a time-wasting first down or two? I won't give Lonnie too much grief for the fumble because he was trying to make a play but damn, every Sooner player, coach and fan nearly took a simultaneous shit it when that ball came loose.  The 2010 Sooners are nothing if not dramatic.

On to the Game Balls/Helmet Stickers/Cheers/Cups-on-the-Butt/Post-Coital Embrace etc.

To DeMarco Murray for once again carrying the load and for getting himself penciled in for my Offensive POG pick for the Big 12 Championship (may the Sooners be so fortunate to go) and whatever bowl game we play. I did not realize how close DeMarco was to becoming OU's all-time touchdown's leader. Pretty amazing and rarified air. I have a feeling DeMarco will go down as one of the most underrated Sooners of all time. But that's another post.

To DeJuan Miller. Each week he has two or three grabs that always seem to move the chains, change the momentum or come at key times. Saturday was his best yet. He's realizing his potential. I'm proud of him and I'm not sure why. I know nothing about him beyond his clutch catches and uniform number. Cameron Kenney we hardly knew ye.

To Jeremy Beal. Five tackles, two sacks and forced fumble. Also, he made Navin and I infinitely (okay, somewhat) less douchey by validating our Defensive POG picks and my defensive breakdown "piece".

To James Winchester for recovering the Aaron Williams muff (snicker) and providing the obligatory Sooner player "upside-down hookem" (see also Lehman, Teddy and Jones, Kejuan et al).

To Aaron Williams for muffing the punt.

To Mack Brown for always bringing unintentional comedy to an otherwise tense, violent affair. I can't wait for the time texas is flagged for a blatant hold and Mack bursts a vessel in his forehead. It will be glorious.

Enjoy the off week.

OU - Texas

It's hard to believe we're already here. I've been to this game in person exactly one time. It was the same 1996 contest that Navin waxed so poetically about in his post. For some reason when I enrolled at OU the athletic office sold me a seat to the game right there on the spot. I found myself on the 50 yard line about two rows up and behind the texas bench. When James Allen won the game in overtime my euphoria was matched only by the girth of my prodigious boner (I'm a steed). As I was leaving the Cotton Bowl I met up with some Sig Ep bretheren and we proceeded to heckle relentlessly in the faces of every texas fan we came across. To the victors go the spoils.

Nowadays I rarely go down to Dallas as I've come to realize I can get drunk in front of my or a friends television and sleep in my own bed afterwards all whilst spending about $500 less. Don't hate, we're in a recession. So that's what I'll be doing today. Hanging out with about 30 other die hard Sooner fans at TFrye's house (allegedly the new King of New York).

If you want proof that any asshole can have both a blog, an opinion and not a clue, I offer you this. I also know very little about texas. You know why? I hate them. I have better shit to do with my time than cruise the Interwebs for stats, facts and figures related to those assholes. Trust me, there's plenty of texas people out there who will all too eagerly tell you how awesome they are. In short I have nothing solid to base my feelings of this contest. I stand wobbily on Crimson Colored Glasses.

Here's the deal. The Sooner offense has just enough weapons that Lonnie won't have to take too many chances. In theory this should mean less opportunities for interceptions. Also, knocking on wood here, the Sooners haven't fumbled the ball yet. Everybody knock on wood again please. So, even against a stout defense, I like our chances. Look for lots of short to intermediate throws from Lonnie. Look for lots of throws to the Trey Millards and Trent Ratteree's of the offense and especially look for creative ways to get the ball to Ryan Broyles so he can get the ball in open space. He'll expose the texas D for the terrible tacklers they are (based on no basis of fact, but I'm sure of it because they are texas and they fellate one another at practice).

What are the Sooners going to do on defense? I'm glad I asked. I think they do everything possible to make Garrett Gilbert beat them. I can't remember a texas Quarterback who struck less fear in the hearts of Sooner Nation. This is telling when you consider the storied history of effeminate texas quarterbacks. All day long it's base Nickel packages, stuffing the run and making Gilbert make plays. I think the Sooners get two, maybe three INT's.

Also, I'm truly going to be disappointed with anything less than Florida State type intensity out of the D. Really, it should easily exceed it. In a perfect world this lends itself to 60 minutes of flying to the football like your hair is on fire. The lack of same has been the bane of this Sooner D in every other game. They fix that today.

The Picks

Offense
The burden is heavy on Lonnie but he has the best weapon for either team. For that reason I'm picking the weapon, Ryan Broyles. I really think they try a lot of different things to get him the ball and he lays waste to the texas D. Broyles is a Norman native, he's no longer wide-eyed and he knows probably better than anyone what this game means. I now have a chub.

Defense
Navin, you really had me on the edge of my seat. I was pretty confident we would arrive at the same conclusion. Of course it happened. Look, I don't need to go through all the options because Navin did that quite ably. Jeremy Beal is going to wreak havoc on Gilbert and the texas O-Line. Whoever has him (again, too lazy and indifferent to look up the names of any texas O-Linemen) will have his hands on his hips with shoulders sagging. No bullshit. Jeremy Beal is going to own.

The Conclusion
This isn't going to be 7-3 or 63-3. I don't see it as a defensive struggle either. The Sooner offense is better. When they want to, the Sooner D can be as good as anyone. I cannot believe they won't be jacked today. I like Sooners (obviously).

28-14
Boomer to the motherfuckin' Sooner

OU-Texas

Well, if you're reading this blog then you not only write half of it, but you know this is a huge game today. For the first time this season I'm not wearing down a good drunk from the night before, so let's see if the quality changes for better or worse. Every year this one is amazing. Well, for the last decade + or so anyway. My first OU-Texas was in 1996, we were mired in the John Blake era and were basically not even a shell of our former greatness. Texas was ranked high, and we hadn't won a game yet. When James Allen plunged across the goal line tallying the go ahead and clinching score (give Blake this much credit, he only beat two teams that year OSU and Texas, I'm just saying if you had to pick two...), I basically went as apeshit as you might expect a drunk 18 year old to. Anyway, my point with that little jaunt down mammary lane is that it doesn't really matter that Texas has looked weaker than usual (it isn't as if we've been dominant either), this game will be extremely tough. I know Stewart Mandel (read: total fuckface and person I'd be most likely to take an unprovoked assault charge over) thinks this one will be similar to last season's 16-13 defensive struggle, but I kind of feel the opposite for no real reason other than I hate his guts. I think Texas has a really good defense and a really bad offense. I think we have above average (but not dominant) of both. How that matches up I'm not really sure, but I think like most years it will be each team just trying answer the other. The fact that I'm sure we'll give up some big ones, makes me think (hope) that we answer with some big ones. In that vein, I think we'll each score some points here and, as fans, we'll endure some sloppy periods as well.

I've only personally seen Garrett Gilbert play a portion of one football game, the national championship of last season. He looked overmatched, and at times like he wanted to cry. Sadly, he held back the tears. While I'll certainly miss the images of Colt McCoy and Jordan Shipley wrestling shirtless with short cut-offs in a meadow with biceps glistening eventually collapsing into a sweaty, spent heap (editors note: this may or may not have actually happened), I've been pretty encouraged by Gilbert era so far. He managed to not throw any picks against Rice and Wyoming, but threw three against Tech and one against UCLA, leaving him with 4 TD's and 4 picks on the season. I'm hoping that we add to the latter column today. Additionally, he's been somewhat proned to the sack. In (very) limited time last year, he was sacked twice, and this year he's been sacked five times. I'm not sure if that speaks more to the O-line or the fact that he can't make a decision. Probably some of both, but given that they don't run the ball extremely well I'm hoping we can dominate the front today, at least on defense.

I know in past seasons we've had some slow starts defensively (not this slow mind you) and things have rounded into form when conference play starts, I'm hoping for that same pattern this year. I don't know for a fact (and am waaay to lazy to actually look) that we've ever been ranked so low defensively, but it certainly doesn't feel like it, and I don't know that it bodes well. For all of our struggles and inconsistency from Lonnie, the defense worries me far more. We've put up plenty of points to win every week, obviously, but have given up way too many (and at bad times) to be comfortable late in any game save one. Publicly it seems that the company line is everything is fine, when most definitely it is not fine. We've not been able to prevent anyone from running or passing the ball. Allowing teams to access their entire playbook doubles their capabilities (save yourself, I did the math) than if we could at least shut down the run. We absolutely have to fix one of the two, preferably both, today. On to the picks...

Offense

While Broyles and DeMarco have been amazing, as Mitch so aptly pointed out yesterday (by the way, an in-season position by position breakdown of our offense? Really? That's the kind of hard hitting journalism that will get you out of the blogosphere and into print. While I'm writing shit that my mom might hang on the fridge next to my hand-tracing/turkey painting, Mitch is actually writing material of value. In short, stop making me look bad. My self esteem is closer to the ground than Mack Brown's knees on a recruiting trip, skeet skeet), I think Texas has the talent on defense to take those two guys away from us on most downs. As a result, somebody else has to step up. While I love Stills and Madu, I think I'm heading back down the road to Lonnie this week. Texas absolutely wants, nee defies him to beat them. While he's been inconsistent at best, I think today he gets his shit together. I like Kevin Wilson & Co., to get him rolling early with short slants, screens and dumps out of the backfield to get him in a groove like we saw in the FSU game. Lonnie seems to really have a confidence issue (read: not what you want in a QB), but when it's up he can really play well. I like for him to roll early and hit some guys not named Broyles

Defense

Though Mitch and I haven't actually discussed this yet, I have a gut feeling that we are going to pick the same guy here. After reading his column yesterday, I think we're on a similar page. I've had my defensive pick all week and with game day upon us, my mind is steadfast. The secondary has been up and down, and while it has shown glimpses we just haven't had enough glimpses for me to pick someone from that position set. I know Travis "Old Steady" (it's official now) Lewis will have his typical game, 10-12 tackles no flash, although he's played in enough of these now I briefly gave him consideration for this award in that I think he'll be pumped up. No, I think our player of the game will come from the front. Stacy McGee showed enough last week that I'm fired up about him now, but he's still inconsistent. Frank Alexander, one of my favorite players for whatever reason, will be everywhere today...but still doesn't do quite enough to make me pet his naughty bits. In this one I like Jeremy Beal. Beal made some comments this week that lead me to believe he will be ready to put a foot in the collective ass of Texas. I think he and Gilbert will become acquainted to the chagrin of young Gilbert. I love Beal in this one for at least two sacks, and a slew of disruptions/tackles/hate fucks.

As I alluded to earlier, I think some points will be scored in this one. I also think Stoops is tired of the racket that we are now owned by Texas. Texas is on their heels a bit, but with something to prove. We've been struggling...and hearing about it ad nauseum. I like us to do enough in this one that we pull it out and go into the by-week unbeaten and firmly in the drivers seat for the conference. Final score today 37-33 in favor of the Sooners. Let's go out and get these miserable fucks.

Boomer to the Motherfuckin' Sooner

Pre-texas Thoughts

I'm trying to come up with this week's Players of the Game. In the biggest games it stands to reason a team's best players should prove it. This got me to wondering, "Who is the best player on this Sooner Defense?"

For the Sooner Offense, it's a debate between two players. DeMarco or Ryan Broyles. DeMarco because he can line up anywhere, be a legit big-target receiver or, just as easily, he can put his hat down and power for 3 or 4 yards when you need it. He is the bell-cow of the offense and make no mistake. Broyles is by far the most electric home-run threat. I don't think many people could get a hand on him in flag football. His moves are filthy in a Two Girls, One Cup kind of way. Both contribute on special teams also. So, taking the easy way out, I'll say DeMarco is the MVP and Broyles is the best player.

It's impossible to identify the Alpha Male on Defense. Through 4 games it's tough to identify the best player in each unit (Line, Linebacker and Secondary).  In the ultimate team sport this is probably a good thing. On defense in particular this could be a great thing but only if the whole is greater than the sum of the parts. I'm not sure that's what we have here.

Let's break it down by group:

Defensive Line
Probably the easiest group to dissect. Jeremy Beal was on the short list for 2010 MF'er and he's showing that the consideration was well deserved. But at any given time guys like Stacy McGee and David King have really stepped up. McGee's continual improvement is going to be critical the rest of the way. Real talk.

Linebackers
Since Ronnell has been moved to DE and hasn't been on the field much anyways this is a two-man race twixt Tom Wort and Travis "Old Steady" Lewis. And in my mind I would say Tom Wort is the guy who jumps out on tape. But, I'm a mouth-breathing clod with a high BAC (*See chart below) when I'm watching the games so it was easy for me to overlook Old Steady. Quietly he's leading the team in tackles and has an INT to boot. Stats aren't everything but it certainly indicates Old Steady is doing his job, "In a great way" as Coach Stoops would say.

Secondary
This group is the biggest clusterfuck but in a good way. Obviously Quinton M.F. Carter has been doing his thing. But Tony Jefferson is a badass. Navin's right that he is on the 2011 M.F. watchlist. And I'll tell you who else is coming on is that Jonathan Nelson. Against Utah State he really tried to make his case to become 2010's Gasrag McGee. But since he's become a bit of a force. Jamell Fleming is the guy teams really like to pick on but he has 6 pass break ups and for the most part is playing pretty well. With a gun to my head I'd say Jefferson (Reminder: True Frosh) is the best but I'd certainly listen to arguments.

I think I know who I'll take for Defensive POG but I'll reveal that later.

*I looked up this chart and got a real good laugh. I'd say I watch most games in the .11 to .20 range.

.11 to .20 Behaviors

• Over-expression
• Emotional swings
• Angriness or sadness
• Boisterousness
• SuperHuman Feeling
• Decreased Libido

.11 to .20 Impairments

• Reflexes
• Reaction time
• Gross motor control
• Staggering
• Slurred speech

Sounds about right save the libido part.