OU - Texas

It's hard to believe we're already here. I've been to this game in person exactly one time. It was the same 1996 contest that Navin waxed so poetically about in his post. For some reason when I enrolled at OU the athletic office sold me a seat to the game right there on the spot. I found myself on the 50 yard line about two rows up and behind the texas bench. When James Allen won the game in overtime my euphoria was matched only by the girth of my prodigious boner (I'm a steed). As I was leaving the Cotton Bowl I met up with some Sig Ep bretheren and we proceeded to heckle relentlessly in the faces of every texas fan we came across. To the victors go the spoils.

Nowadays I rarely go down to Dallas as I've come to realize I can get drunk in front of my or a friends television and sleep in my own bed afterwards all whilst spending about $500 less. Don't hate, we're in a recession. So that's what I'll be doing today. Hanging out with about 30 other die hard Sooner fans at TFrye's house (allegedly the new King of New York).

If you want proof that any asshole can have both a blog, an opinion and not a clue, I offer you this. I also know very little about texas. You know why? I hate them. I have better shit to do with my time than cruise the Interwebs for stats, facts and figures related to those assholes. Trust me, there's plenty of texas people out there who will all too eagerly tell you how awesome they are. In short I have nothing solid to base my feelings of this contest. I stand wobbily on Crimson Colored Glasses.

Here's the deal. The Sooner offense has just enough weapons that Lonnie won't have to take too many chances. In theory this should mean less opportunities for interceptions. Also, knocking on wood here, the Sooners haven't fumbled the ball yet. Everybody knock on wood again please. So, even against a stout defense, I like our chances. Look for lots of short to intermediate throws from Lonnie. Look for lots of throws to the Trey Millards and Trent Ratteree's of the offense and especially look for creative ways to get the ball to Ryan Broyles so he can get the ball in open space. He'll expose the texas D for the terrible tacklers they are (based on no basis of fact, but I'm sure of it because they are texas and they fellate one another at practice).

What are the Sooners going to do on defense? I'm glad I asked. I think they do everything possible to make Garrett Gilbert beat them. I can't remember a texas Quarterback who struck less fear in the hearts of Sooner Nation. This is telling when you consider the storied history of effeminate texas quarterbacks. All day long it's base Nickel packages, stuffing the run and making Gilbert make plays. I think the Sooners get two, maybe three INT's.

Also, I'm truly going to be disappointed with anything less than Florida State type intensity out of the D. Really, it should easily exceed it. In a perfect world this lends itself to 60 minutes of flying to the football like your hair is on fire. The lack of same has been the bane of this Sooner D in every other game. They fix that today.

The Picks

Offense
The burden is heavy on Lonnie but he has the best weapon for either team. For that reason I'm picking the weapon, Ryan Broyles. I really think they try a lot of different things to get him the ball and he lays waste to the texas D. Broyles is a Norman native, he's no longer wide-eyed and he knows probably better than anyone what this game means. I now have a chub.

Defense
Navin, you really had me on the edge of my seat. I was pretty confident we would arrive at the same conclusion. Of course it happened. Look, I don't need to go through all the options because Navin did that quite ably. Jeremy Beal is going to wreak havoc on Gilbert and the texas O-Line. Whoever has him (again, too lazy and indifferent to look up the names of any texas O-Linemen) will have his hands on his hips with shoulders sagging. No bullshit. Jeremy Beal is going to own.

The Conclusion
This isn't going to be 7-3 or 63-3. I don't see it as a defensive struggle either. The Sooner offense is better. When they want to, the Sooner D can be as good as anyone. I cannot believe they won't be jacked today. I like Sooners (obviously).

28-14
Boomer to the motherfuckin' Sooner