Saturday, September 1, 2018

Snark, Innuendo, Uninformed Opinion; It's Steamroller Week 1 - Florida Atlantic

Welcome back to the 2018 edition of the Steamroller. I watched a lot of soccer and baseball during the football offseason. I didn't check out the Red-White Game, I avoid message boards out of principal and The Oklahoman's football preview centered around the uniform change from Nike to Jordan. So, I feel really well prepared for this season.

I do know it's year two  of the Lincoln Riley era, year one of the post-Baker Damn Mayfield era and, apparently, year six of the return of Mike Stoops. It's been a while since there was so much uncertainty entering the season. This uncertainty does not come with diminished expectations.

I'll deal with my anxiety from least to greatest and start with Lincoln Riley. If I have confidence in anyone being able to lose a Heisman Trophy quarterback and take any cast and turn it into a 40 point scoring unit it's Lincoln Riley and it's not as if the cupboard is bare. Rodney Anderson was the most pleasant surprise on offense last year and is coming into the season healthy. CeeDee Lamb and Marquise "Hollywood" Brown are monsters in complementary ways. Trey Sermon has a year of experience under his belt. Only Landry Jones could do less with more. 

Speaking of Landry, the bar for Kyler Murray is anything greater than Landry and better or equal to Baker Mayfield. That will win another Big 12 championship. We know he has the arm and the wheels. Does he shit his pants and take off running too often in the face of a half assed pass rush? Can he check down multiple receivers? Can he make quality decisions on a consistent basis? He's played before and he's done well. The earlier these questions get answered, the better. But again, while there is no greater pressure on a QB in the country there is help carrying the load and the more effectively said load is distributed, the better off the offense will be. Quick reminder: Lincoln Riley is calling plays.

Finally there's Mike Stoops, who, according to wikipedia, has one career highlight since 2012:

In 2012, after a disappointing return as defensive coordinator to the University of Oklahoma, Mike Stoops impregnated an exotic dancer at the popular local haunt "Sugers" in Norman, Oklahoma.

It's safe to say the return of Mike Stoops has been underwhelming. He's been relegated to the booth on game days because his temperament is ill-suited (in a bad way) for today's culture. The last few years his defense's scoring average has been more formulaic (Whatever OU scores +/- 1 defensive stop  = points given up) than of consistent quality. It has made for thrilling viewing in the same way a drunk fart can fall on a knifes edge.

I am convinced that Stoops was coaching for his job every game after Iowa State last year. There's no way to know if I was right or wrong (which is precisely the sort of thin limb I like to step out on) but he's still in charge of the D. It sounds like recruiting is on the uptick and the most ballyhooed freshman on the squad will be starting on his side of the ball for the second straight year.

What I'm telling you is there is no better time to be optimistic about this defense than right now. It won't take long to find out if they are worth a damn or not.

OFFENSE

The focus will be on Kyler Murray and my suspicion is that Riley will not hold back utilizing him in any conceivable way. He should be giddy at the thought of unleashing the wheels of Marquise Brown and the arm of a big league center fielder.

I think a lot of coaches would lean more heavily on Rodney Anderson or maybe try to keep Murray in the pocket but that's not how this offense operates. Having to account for Murray's speed is the key to the show. He's my choice for OPOG. I think he's going to have some alarmingly easy throws to make.

DEFENSE

I'd by lying if I said I wasn't a little worried about a Lane Kiffin offense seemingly comprised of degenerate castoffs and transfers going up against a Mike Stoops defense in game one. The good news is there is good experience at all levels. The cornerbacks are solid and settled.

Can anyone tackle? It'd be a lot cooler if they could.

I'm throwing a week 1 dart in true Steamroller fashion and taking Tre Norwood for my DPOG. It's sheer gut instinct. My wet dream would be for someone from the D-Line or linebacker group to prove themselves a force that must be accounted for on every play. I'm not too nervous for my bedsheets though.

THE SCORE

There will be some good, bad and ugly in this one. But the Sooners need to be sharp overall. The first four weeks of this season are the toughest I can remember any year.

I think the offense will be smooth enough to score enough and the D comes out hungry ready to show that they can make a leap.

Sooners 45, FAU 24

Boomer to the motherfuckin Sooner

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